In an attempt to distract from ocd

Hello.
Having a bad day which is why I've started this.
Have finished 19 rituals of various inanity/insanity (stroking bed side, walking up and down room, circling, stamping feet) today, on the 20th and so tired, having a break. In an attempt to distract from ritual. But I will do it tonight. I am too far down the road.
The current part is this startlingly intellectual routine: starting in my bedroom down and up stairs, open and close my bedroom doors, up and down again, close doors plus 1 each time starting from 3 so 9 x down and up, each time into bedroom, close and open doors 3x then after 9 x, each one add one extra open and close doors....ocders will know what I mean. if I make a mistake it triples. But why leave it now after all day spent, and me on the 19th hole? How can I leave it. it is the only thing that matters to me now, strangling everything else.
In an attempt to stop myself completing the ritual, I'm thinking of various platitudes eg, justify my thoughts (yes the compulsion is pointless, and yes no good will come from it, but at this stage it actually seems justifiable to do this, just to finish , to feel good again, to feel like ME), ...and I can't think of any reason NOT to do this routine, except because of this ocd shit and probably shit personality too, I still live with my parent s and they are right next to my bedroom door and it will drive them crazy if I bang up and down alll night.

I hope I find a way out of this tonight into the blessed post-ocd high. Symmetry compulsions bad at moment but at least the only thing about having a day long hell like today is that the usual complulsions I have like washing hands when come in' go to toilet etc the ones that drain your life away are chased away by the intensity of the big one that grows and fucking grows like someparasite worm all day inside your head. Damn damn damn. If anyone reads this and is at the start of some compulsion please don't give in. FIGHT. Fight. Because it is easier to stub it out right at the start of it, than ten hours in. I know that and that is how I manage most days. Dont let it get a hold. Wish I could go back to this morning and stop the bloody symmetry compulsion that started all this because I might have actually been able to live today if I had. So knock it out now. Yeah listen to me talking, bloody hell, but I do try. that's all we can do.